5.09.2008

Feeling hungry?

How do you make a "Tired Dianna" sandwich?

Well, first you need the base, your bread. My bread consists of a 40-hr a week day job. I'm on hour 39 of my 40 RIGHT NOW. My bread is imitation wonder bread - it looks tough but one swipe of the butter knife and it falls to bits.
Then you add your condiments, which is any EXTRA work you may do during the week. A light week will get you nice things like "Grey Poupon" or "pesto". Tonight is hours 12 through 19.5 of my almost 20 hour work week at my SECOND JOB. Not quite Miracle Whip yet, but it certainly wasn't Hellman's either.
Then there's your meat. The meat represents how much sleep you've had. The more fou-fou and expensive sounding the meat is, the more sleep you've had. This wasn't quite a SPAM week of sleep, more an "olive loaf" week.
ANd finally, there's your cheese. Cheese represents the amount of crap you've had to deal with. The better the cheese, the better your week went. I had a "fake american cheese in those cellophane wrappers" kind of weeks. No, not Kraft singles, the CHEAP version of that. Not an out and out crappy week (represented lovingly by welfare cheese), but just bad enough - you direct people into a theatre during a downpour and tell me what kind of week YOU had :)

Now, when I woke up this morning, I thought my sandwich was pretty bad. It could totally get worse, but I wasn't sure how that could be.
Then I got my side salad of cramps and my menstruation back of chips and knew my week was done.

over and out.

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